New Star Wars stuff announced

smokehouse

I was Born This Ugly.,
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Posts
12,919
I still don't get the R1 hate...it's a watchable film, in my opinion. I'm not expecting brilliance in SW films...I just don't want to suffer through Jar Jar and running out of space gas, neither of which R1 had.

We watched Solo last night...it too was fine. Watchable, pointless, but entertaining enough to sit though. The SJW robot was a bit much, but that ended soon enough. I don't have any emotional attachment to anyone in either Solo or R1...but I'm ok with that.
 

fake

King of Spammers
15 Year Member
Joined
Jul 26, 2008
Posts
10,977
I still don't get the R1 hate...it's a watchable film, in my opinion. I'm not expecting brilliance in SW films...I just don't want to suffer through Jar Jar and running out of space gas, neither of which R1 had.

Same. If I had to watch a new SW movie, it would be VII or Rogue One.
 

Lagduf

2>X
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2002
Posts
46,682
I’d watch VIII but only because I liked some stuff with Luke.

The entire premise of the new trilogy, however, is just so lazy.

I’m fine with Jedi order ending. Like they say in that one Star Wars game; The Jedi Order fell long before the purge.

What I’m not OK with is Luke failing like Obi-Wan et al did.

Fuck that.

If I have to watch new Star Wars I’ll just stick with Mando.
 

smokehouse

I was Born This Ugly.,
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Posts
12,919
I’d watch VIII but only because I liked some stuff with Luke.

The entire premise of the new trilogy, however, is just so lazy.

I’m fine with Jedi order ending. Like they say in that one Star Wars game; The Jedi Order fell long before the purge.

What I’m not OK with is Luke failing like Obi-Wan et al did.

Fuck that.

If I have to watch new Star Wars I’ll just stick with Mando.

Again, I'll begin with the same old, same old. It's SW, I don't expect amazing writing. With that said:

-Episodes IV-VI were very superficial movies. Decent enough good/bad guys, an antagonist, a linear plot line. Got the job done.

-Episodes I-III were really function over form. There's a lot of plot there in those three films, they cover a lot of ground and explain all kinds of things about the originals of the empire and the fall of the republic. There's enough there to let you know the origins of Darth Vader, fair enough. I wish there was more about the Sith, but oh well.

-Episodes VII-IX are just a hot mess. There's all kinds of attempts to start plot lines, but they're all so horribly fragmented. VII really tried to set up all kinds of plot points, but then XIII pretty much broke every single one of them. IX was just a knee-jerk to make a sad attempt at tying it all up. Like taking a large pile of broken glass and randomly dumping it into a trash bag.

We had some free time in class a while ago and this all came up. I segmented the boards into trilogy sections and we all put the plot points of the films on the board. I-III had a ton of stuff in it. VII-IX was pretty much nothing or at best, open ended trash.

I guess this is why I was ok with R1...it had a beginning, a purpose, a plot, and it ended. No open things, no odd plot points to nowhere. It was ok. Solo:

Spoiler:
ending open like it did with Emilia clarke's character dealing with Darth maul really sucked...we'll never see that go anywhere. Darth Maul could have been really cool...
 

@M

Vanessa's Drinking Buddy,
20 Year Member
Joined
Feb 10, 2003
Posts
7,174
Well, we COULD have a Dash Rendar series, but, my vote goes for Princess Leia and Prince Xizor parody porn instead if we're going to revisit Shadows of the Empire. Chewie should get some action with Guri too!
 

Ajax

way more american than wyo, way more
15 Year Member
Joined
Oct 9, 2005
Posts
5,092
Looking over what SW is, it's a miracle that anybody likes any of it.
 

famicommander

Tak enabled this rank change
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 18, 2007
Posts
13,381
Looking over what SW is, it's a miracle that anybody likes any of it.

The TV shows are yet to miss badly since the 2003 Genndy Tartakovsky series hit:
Clone Wars (2003)
Clone Wars (2008)
Rebels
Resistance
The Mandalorian

Resistance is by far the weakest link but it's really meant for kids, even more so than Star Wars already is for kids in the first place. The other four shows have a lot of good will.

And there have been a lot of good (and, to be fair a lot of awful) books, video games, and comics. It's just the mainline movies that have been such a disappointment.
 

Taiso

Remembers The North,
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2000
Posts
13,156
Well, we COULD have a Dash Rendar series, but, my vote goes for Princess Leia and Prince Xizor parody porn instead if we're going to revisit Shadows of the Empire. Chewie should get some action with Guri too!

That all probably exists.

EDIT: I'd say Solo is a more worthy film than Rogue One, which is the SW equivalent of watching paint dry while the building is burning to the ground: boring, excruciating and utterly worthless. It maybe 'well made', but it's like making a great window frame for a house that already has enough window frames.

Solo is a worse movie but it at least attempts to examine the lore of a character we actually care about. It, too, is nearly fucking pointless since 1.) Han is now dead and 2.) Han should never headline a SW movie; some characters should stay in their fucking lane and Han, as much as we love him, belongs in the supporting character bucket forever. He can have novels and comics and other meaningless shit but in the movies, he is not a main guy. He's the charming, world weary companion character.

So they're both shit. But put a gun to my head and make me choose one, it's Solo 10 times out of 10. I'd nail my hand to a burning building before I'd watch Rogue One again.

I'd watch the Momoa Conan before I'd watch Rogue One.
 
Last edited:

smokehouse

I was Born This Ugly.,
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Posts
12,919
Looking over what SW is, it's a miracle that anybody likes any of it.

I think it's the potential that keeps people coming back. SW can be amazing...it has the potential to be. It rarely is, but there's always that chance.
 

Lagduf

2>X
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2002
Posts
46,682
Again, I'll begin with the same old, same old. It's SW, I don't expect amazing writing. With that said:

-Episodes IV-VI were very superficial movies. Decent enough good/bad guys, an antagonist, a linear plot line. Got the job done.

-Episodes I-III were really function over form. There's a lot of plot there in those three films, they cover a lot of ground and explain all kinds of things about the originals of the empire and the fall of the republic. There's enough there to let you know the origins of Darth Vader, fair enough. I wish there was more about the Sith, but oh well.

-Episodes VII-IX are just a hot mess. There's all kinds of attempts to start plot lines, but they're all so horribly fragmented. VII really tried to set up all kinds of plot points, but then XIII pretty much broke every single one of them. IX was just a knee-jerk to make a sad attempt at tying it all up. Like taking a large pile of broken glass and randomly dumping it into a trash bag.

We had some free time in class a while ago and this all came up. I segmented the boards into trilogy sections and we all put the plot points of the films on the board. I-III had a ton of stuff in it. VII-IX was pretty much nothing or at best, open ended trash.

I guess this is why I was ok with R1...it had a beginning, a purpose, a plot, and it ended. No open things, no odd plot points to nowhere. It was ok. Solo:

Spoiler:
ending open like it did with Emilia clarke's character dealing with Darth maul really sucked...we'll never see that go anywhere. Darth Maul could have been really cool...

It’s apparent the sequel trilogy films were written one at a time rather than a coherent trilogy which really hurts the story.

Who or what is Snoke and why do we care?
How the fuck did the Emperor survive?
 

HeavyMachineGoob

My poontang misses Lenn Yang's wang
10 Year Member
Joined
Apr 3, 2011
Posts
5,816
That all probably exists.

EDIT: I'd say Solo is a more worthy film than Rogue One, which is the SW equivalent of watching paint dry while the building is burning to the ground: boring, excruciating and utterly worthless. It maybe 'well made', but it's like making a great window frame for a house that already has enough window frames.

Solo is a worse movie but it at least attempts to examine the lore of a character we actually care about. It, too, is nearly fucking pointless since 1.) Han is now dead and 2.) Han should never headline a SW movie; some characters should stay in their fucking lane and Han, as much as we love him, belongs in the supporting character bucket forever. He can have novels and comics and other meaningless shit but in the movies, he is not a main guy. He's the charming, world weary companion character.

So they're both shit. But put a gun to my head and make me choose one, it's Solo 10 times out of 10. I'd nail my hand to a burning building before I'd watch Rogue One again.

I'd watch the Momoa Conan before I'd watch Rogue One.

One thing that really pisses me off about Solo is the absolutely shit lighting in many scenes in the film. Who the fuck looked over the film during production and said "Yep, these monochromatic and barely visible scenes are good". It's so amateurish it's embarrassing.

Also, the wokedroid, fuck that thing.
 

Taiso

Remembers The North,
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2000
Posts
13,156
I have a theory about the woke droid.

When the original directors were making the film, that droid was supposed to be a parody of SJW behavior. It was the shot they were taking at Hollywood, which has become insufferably woke beyond parody.

Kennedy, a misandrist, probably resented having to do what talented men told her to do for most of her career, didn't like that the character was making fun of the politics she was shoehorning into a series that just didn't need it.

The original directors left the project over creative differences.

Then Ron Howard came in and suddenly Lando Calrissian was Pando Calrissian.

Because you know, pansexuals EXIST and audiences of all ages entertainment need to educate themselves.
 
Last edited:

LoneSage

A Broken Man
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 20, 2004
Posts
44,746
Because you know, pansexual EXIST and audiences of all ages entertainment need you to educate yourself.

Someone called me an anti-LGBTQ bigot the other day because I said bisexuals and pansexuals are gay.

Then I was all, fuck you, you don't have power over me, just because you say I am doesn't mean I am.

yeah cool story I know
 
Last edited:

SouthtownKid

There are four lights
20 Year Member
Joined
Oct 12, 2003
Posts
26,899
Someone called me an anti-LGBTQ bigot the other day because I said bisexuals and pansexuals are gay.

Then I was all, fuck you, you don't have power over me, just because you say I am doesn't mean I am.

yeah cool story I know
You should have told them they were anti-LGBTQ for interpreting "gay" as an insult.
 

Taiso

Remembers The North,
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2000
Posts
13,156
You should have told them they were anti-LGBTQ for interpreting "gay" as an insult.

Reason doesn't work against the kind of people that would actually say something like that. Reason can never triumph over ideology because ideology believes that every hill, no matter how small, is worth dying on. Reasonable people walk away.
 

smokehouse

I was Born This Ugly.,
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Posts
12,919
It’s apparent the sequel trilogy films were written one at a time rather than a coherent trilogy which really hurts the story.

Who or what is Snoke and why do we care?
How the fuck did the Emperor survive?

VIII really broke the entire thing, it was supposed to be a part two, it was instead a cluster.

Yes, we were introduced to the New Order, Snoke, Kylo, the Knights of Ren, and a whole cast of new characters. It left us on a cliffhanger with the whole Rey-Luke scene.

I should have left the theater the second they had Luke chuck the lightsaber off the cliff...that should have been a warning on where that shit was going.

I know I cannot look at it objectively, but VIII just felt like a giant "go fuck yourself, fanboy" the entire time. IX was just a panic to get some sort of wrap-up to the entire thing. It too was a hot mess, but in an entirely different way. VIII felt intentionally messy and spiteful, as if they took the critics of VII and said "Oh...you wanna complain about Episode VII?...just wait to see what we do next, asshole."
 

Taiso

Remembers The North,
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2000
Posts
13,156
TLJ was intentionally hostile towards anyone that dared to be a fan of the classiv trilogy.

Jake Skywalker chucking the lightsaber over his shoulder is Rian Johnson and Kathleen Kennedy telling those fans 'Star Wars isn't for you, anymore.'

And then telling them they were the problem the whole time. Which has always been SJW messaging in every single fucking thing they've ever done.

The Disnet trilogy had never been about telling a story. It was never about expanding the idea of Star Wars.

The Disney trilogy destroyed three of pop culture's greatest giants. It regressed Han into a deadbeat dad space pirate, Luke into a worthless peasant living on the ass end of space (and then had the fucking gall to try to rebuild him in the same movie, as if Rian Johnson even possesses that kind of talent) and Leia to a failure of a politician that allowed a second empire to rise on her watch.

The Disney trilogy is a willful demolition of everything that made the classic trilogy. If it were Roman times and I had any power, I'd have Johnson and Kennedy fight it out in the arena and then have the winner fed to the lions alongside the Christians.
 
Last edited:

smokehouse

I was Born This Ugly.,
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Posts
12,919
TLJ was intentionally hostile towards anyone that dared to be a fan of the classiv trilogy.

Jake Skywalker chucking the lightsaber over his shoulder is Rian Johnson and Kathleen Kennedy telling those fans 'Star Wars isn't for you, anymore.'

And then telling them they were the problem the whole time. Which has always been SJW messaging in every single fucking thing they've ever done.

The Disnet trilogy had never been about telling a story. It was never about expanding the idea of Star Wars.

The Disney trilogy destroyed three of pop culture's greatest giants. It regressed Han into a deadbeat dad space pirate, Luke into a worthless peasant living on the ass end of space (and then had the fucking gall to try to rebuild him in the same movie, as if Rian Johnson even possesses that kind of talent) and Leia to a failure of a politician that allowed a second empire to rise on her watch.

The Disney trilogy is a willful demolition of everything that made the classic trilogy. If it were Roman times and I had any power, I'd have Johnson and Kennedy fight it out in the arena and then have the winner fed to the lions alongside the Christians.

I agree with all of that.

The lack of wisdom in the decision to dismantle original trilogy characters still blows me away. The fact that no one in charge stopped to think if doing such a thing could be a bad idea is really surprising. If they did it on purpose, that just being vindictive.

Lucas boning up Episode I-III was due to some of his personal flaws as an one-stop movie maker. He had more help on the original films, so the product wasn't as flawed. With that said, I've always felt that with the newer films, his heart was in the right place. I don't get that feeling with the drive behind Ep VII-IX. It was more "Yeah...go fuck yourself", which is borderline business insanity.
 
Last edited:

Taiso

Remembers The North,
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2000
Posts
13,156
Kathleen Kennedy said these two things, and I'm paraphrasing.

1.) We want to honor the legacy of these characters.

She said that in a joint interview with George Lucas and he was sitting right at the table when she said it.

She lied to him. But more importantly, she lied to us.

Honoring them was never in the plan. Kennedy is a dyed in the wool woke-tivist and she actively worked to demolish the thing generations grew up loving. That's an awful lot of self loathing projected onto what was once a cherished cornerstone of American pop culture.

2.) She said they didn't have comics, novels, cartoons, video games, etc to draw from.

Lucas may not have cared about those things beyond the dollars they put in his company's pocket but I assure you he knew they existed.

Bitch, if you aren't qualified for the job, don't take it from someone who is.

Her mismanagement of this franchise is going to go down as one of the colossal botches in business history. It may still make some money but it is no longer a cultural touchstone. Mockery of the old fans passes for defenses of the franchise now. Scorn is subtly couched into every retcon thinkpiece that attempts to explain away Disney's failures that continue to be published even today.
 

smokehouse

I was Born This Ugly.,
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2005
Posts
12,919
Kathleen Kennedy said these two things, and I'm paraphrasing.

1.) We want to honor the legacy of these characters.

She said that in a joint interview with George Lucas and he was sitting right at the table when she said it.

She lied to him. But more importantly, she lied to us.

Honoring them was never in the plan. Kennedy is a dyed in the wool woke-tivist and she actively worked to demolish the thing generations grew up loving. That's an awful lot of self loathing projected onto what was once a cherished cornerstone of American pop culture.

2.) She said they didn't have comics, novels, cartoons, video games, etc to draw from.

Lucas may not have cared about those things beyond the dollars they put in his company's pocket but I assure you he knew they existed.

Bitch, if you aren't qualified for the job, don't take it from someone who is.

Her mismanagement of this franchise is going to go down as one of the colossal botches in business history. It may still make some money but it is no longer a cultural touchstone. Mockery of the old fans passes for defenses of the franchise now. Scorn is subtly couched into every retcon thinkpiece that attempts to explain away Disney's failures that continue to be published even today.

The whole "woke" movement is killing all kinds of entertainment.

At least with SW, it's much larger than Kennedy and I'm sure before too long, Disney will pull her plug.

The best part about SW is that it is so large and has so many possibilities. Who knows what solid stuff will come out in the future. While The Mandalorian is far from perfect, it gives me hope that future things with the SW logo can be enjoyable.


...one last thing, I share your anger for the latest films, I really do. There was a time in my life that the original trilogy was all I had left...and they even shit on that. So much amazing potential for what an older Luke Skywalker could have done...all wasted and in such an irreverent manner...
 

famicommander

Tak enabled this rank change
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 18, 2007
Posts
13,381
aaaannd another one.

Boba Fett getting a show, already filming, premiering December 2021.
 

Lagduf

2>X
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2002
Posts
46,682
Interesting, any details on the Boba Fett show as far as when it takes place?
 

famicommander

Tak enabled this rank change
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 18, 2007
Posts
13,381
Interesting, any details on the Boba Fett show as far as when it takes place?

Watch the end credits scene after the season 2 finale of The Mandalorian. Seems to take place right after that.
 

Lagduf

2>X
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2002
Posts
46,682
lol how have you fuckers already watched it? I’m still at work for more than two more hours.

Also I did the math and Boba would be like...42 lol. He’s a helluva lot older than that in Mando.
 

famicommander

Tak enabled this rank change
15 Year Member
Joined
Sep 18, 2007
Posts
13,381
lol how have you fuckers already watched it? I’m still at work for more than two more hours.

Also I did the math and Boba would be like...42 lol. He’s a helluva lot older than that in Mando.

I think they're going with the Sarlacc pit scarring him up so he looks way older excuse.

Also, Bo Katan should be in her 50s or 60s at this point. She was a grown woman during the Clone Wars. She's way older than Boba.
 
Top