- Joined
- Jul 24, 2001
- Posts
- 19,051
jro said:I would like to request appointment as one of the eight remaining Cardinals. Why am I uniquely qualified for this position, you ask? Because in addition to my promise to never, ever fool Neo-Pope Kawasaki II, I volunteer to act as Enforcer-Cardinal. I will be the first Cardinal in history, Neo, Catholic, or otherwise, to wear a black hood-style executioner's mask as part of my daily attire. I will carry the Large Knife of Castration, for serious cases in which we must assure that the offender will not be allowed to procreate and no amount of absolution will suffice (cough *freelancer* cough), and I will also gladly administer the Public Spankings in the event that N-PKII prefers not to sully his holy hands on the backsides of the Confessors.
I may even be willing to host candle parties at which other Cardinals and prospective future Popes will be able to buy black candles to be given to Confessors should they be instructed to insert said candles into their anuses and then go shopping.
I also will buy if someone else flies upon the end of our beer and subs reserves.
So do I get the gig?
Enforcer-Cardinal... sounds good, you're in!
You can assign up to two secretaries if you want. If they look good, you're requested to bring them to our weekly, uhm, 'meetings' to give them their bukka.#@%..official introduction.
Good thinking with the candle selling. On one of our next meetings I'll introduce you to Shawn M. who has a video game store and also is into black candle manufacturing, his new model "papal double penetration" really is something other than else... Maybe you could setup some sort of deal with him...
Bobak, I'm delighted to hear the heretic is gone, he already was scaring the herd. Hope my Zombie powder was of any use for you, I bought it from the Necro store and really paid an arm and a leg for it.
Oh and let's not forget about our neo-pope calender project with a new pic of bishounen boys and shemales every month... when Bobak was finished strip-searching me after my election, I saw Mushiki dressed in a transparent nighty, sitting on the floor of the search room while he was nibbling on PSP dust covers, he would make a good "February boy" I guess. Any suggestions here?