Case of the missing DVDs

caleb1883

Super Spy Agent
Joined
May 24, 2006
Posts
600
Alright, I'm venting and raging pissed and want a little more advice before I go ape shit on my new roomate. I am not the most organized person in the world, but when it comes to my games and movies I know where everything is located and I always keep it in the same place. That being said, I went to go watch some Planet Earth HD DVD last night, and sure enough they weren't were they usually are. So I proceeded to check all the rest of the room, and no sign of them. I checked closets, and my bedroom and still nothing. They shouldn't have been anywhere else but on the DVD shelf with all my other HD DVDs, but I still proceeded to double and triple check all other locations. Not there and there is a blank space where it used to be staring at me from the DVD shelf. On top of that, they are HD-DVDs, which almost no one would have any practical use for.

Now, the roomate backstory. I have two. One who has lived there a year, and who I knew a year before that. She is always on time with bills, she works hard and goes to college. I trust her completley. My last roomate moved out, and he is also a longtime friend who even offered to pay an extra month to help me out until I found a new roomate. He wouldn't have taken them either. We enter in the third potential culprit, the new roomate.

I pick him up from the airport two weeks ago, and he tells me he blew his rent money in Vegas on the way here, and said he would pay me double at the end of the month when he got his first check from his new job. So, being the nice guy I am I said, sure, as long you are on time at the end of the month we are good. So I feel bad for him because he sleeps on the floor cause he has no money, he eats rice every day to conserve, and walks everywhere. I feel sorry for him, and wake up an hour early to drive him to work on rainy days, and offer to take him to Wal-Mart for when he gets money to buy stuff like a bed etc. Well anyways, everythings good until the other night when he invites me out to drink with him. I get there and he is already lit up real good, and is so obnoxious I thought I was going to hit him, or have to hit someone else to break up a fight because he was physically grabbing random people (mostly girls) and insulting them. He is offering to buy me and other random girls shots of whatever. I find this strange considering he couldn't pay rent at the beginning of the month. He was pissing people off so bad I had to get him out of there, so I take him and my friend to a quiet late night place, where he proceeds to insult our waiter and creep out the girls sitting in the booth next to us. I was completley embarrased. He then proceeds me to tell me he thinks its too cold in the apartment, and that I'm too loud when I watch TV downstairs. In three years and 4 roomates, no one has ever complained about the TV at any volume, ever. He then tells me when the check comes, "I know what your thinking mother fucker, but don't worry. You'll get your money at the end of the month." He pays his own tab, and we go home. I offer to let him use our extra blankets because he doesn't have any and he said it was cold to which he replies, "I don't take anything from anybody. I used to be homeless, I can survive anything." I find it very odd, considering he is 27 years old.

So the next day, my long time friend who hung out that night stayed over, and my new roomie claims that he blacked out, and asked me how he was last night. I told him he was crazy, and almost started a fight. That next night, I notice the DVDs missing. So I text all my friends ask them if they saw or borrowed the DVDs, just to cover my bases because I know they would never take anything from me without asking. I ask my long time trusted roomate if she borrowed them, which says no, and she says she hasn't seen them. My friend who stayed over says he did see them on the TV stand that night, but didn't see them the next day. I called him to confirm, and he says he certainly remembered seeing them the night of the drunken escapade, but doesn't remember exactly if they were on the shelf or somewhere else. I search the room a fourth time and turn up nothing.

Now the night I noticed they were missing my new 'so broke he can't pay rent' roomate was out drinking again, and he texted me to come out. I said no, and asked him if he had borrowed my DVDs. He said he didn't and said he was coming home from the bar since I wasn't going out. Not five minutes later he said he changed his mind and was staying out. I don't when he got home, or if he even went to work today.

Things just all seem to point towards my new roomate taking the DVDs He has a shady background, shady behavior, and suspect alcoholism. I don't want to point the finger and find out they were under a pile of clothes somewhere, and end up kicking him out and not getting my money, but at the same time if he did do it I don't want to risk anymore stuff going out the door with him. I think I should wait till the end of the month and if he turns over a good check promptly and on time as promised, he is solid. If he doesn't I'm pretty sure I can assume he took the DVDs, and I'll throw him out, using his head to open the door.
 

GregN

aka The Grinch
20 Year Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2000
Posts
17,570
I didn't bother to read that, but the title makes a good pun.
 

Murray

Akari's Big Brother
Joined
Aug 16, 2005
Posts
2,533
Get out of that situation as quickly as you legally can. If you can legally swap the locks on him and never let him in again, I say do that. This can only end badly for the people who aren't assholes.
 

Lashujin

Ghost of Captain Kidd
Joined
Dec 2, 2002
Posts
1,654
Yeah, I'd wait till the end of the month. He may have taken them, but to what end? I'd maybe kick him out anyway after you get the money, is he on the lease?
 

kernow

The Goob Hunter
20 Year Member
Joined
Sep 1, 2001
Posts
35,019
fuck it, out out out.

he'll only ruin your life more and more.

several times I've seen the nice guys get screwed over by assholes who don't give a shit about other people. it sucks. get him out now to save more hassle in future.
 

Murray

Akari's Big Brother
Joined
Aug 16, 2005
Posts
2,533
He may have taken them, but to what end?
Booze money? Gambling money? I think both have been shown to be possible / likely scenarios.

The problem with waiting for the end of the month is the risk that more stuff will go missing. The problem with warning him you're going to kick him out is ... you guessed it ... more stuff missing.

This isn't some after school special with the misunderstood kid that used to be homeless getting framed for stealing. This is your home and your life. Cut your losses and get rid of this guy, while the losses are still relatively small.
 

Comrade Porn King Mikhail

TЗh ЯussiaИs Дre CФm
Joined
Oct 11, 2000
Posts
3,486
Living with roommates you don't know and who aren't friends or friends' friends, I'd have a lock on my door at all times. I just don't like people rifling through my stuff, ever since college when I bought the N64 and was the only one with it in the dorm. I let everyone play it and the only rule was DON'T PLAY with my 3rd spare controller on every other weekend when I go home. Play all you want otherwise with any controller, but don't use my freaking black controller.

Sure enough, find someone using it when they didn't recoil it in the special way I did. Just can't trust people without locking stuff up. Anyways, I'd keep my door locked and my gun in the car. If I came home and shit was opened up without my permission, the gun would escort the person out the door for good!

Sincerely,

Mikhail
 

Ancient Flounder

"Just walk away. Give me the pump...the oil...the
15 Year Member
Joined
Apr 23, 2004
Posts
3,747
If things seem shady, then it's 99% likely it is. I've had to deal with flaky-ass people living with me before and it's just a bad scene all around. Get this dude out there as soon as you possibly can, before he robs you blind.
 

Blue Steel

previously "bubu_X"
Joined
Feb 26, 2003
Posts
3,838
How much are HD-DVD's even worth? I suppose the Planet Earth ones must still be worth $30-40 maybe. Your situation doesn't sound too good, I would hate to have to be someone's babysitter like that.
 

HeartlessNinny

Heartlessness is a virtue
Joined
Sep 16, 2005
Posts
14,664
It's not worth it. Roommates aren't that hard to come by... Get rid of this guy immediately, before he steals from you again. Changing the locks would be an investment at this point...

Normally I believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt. But there are limits. Get rid of him.
 

caleb1883

Super Spy Agent
Joined
May 24, 2006
Posts
600
Thanks for re enforcing my thinking. I just didn't know if I was jumping to conclusions or not. I'm going to go down to the closest place he could walk to and trade in DVDs for cash. I already checked Ebay, and didn't really turn up anything.

Legally I'm not sure what I can do here. He has not signed paperwork with me. My name is on the lease, and the landlord allows me to sub-lease at will. I'm assuming since I have no paperwork and no money from him I could change the locks and hold his stuff hostage until I get a check. I know from my business law class you have to have consideration, or both parties have to give something up to have a contract, written or unwritten, and he hasn't given anything to me.
 

ilazul

Enemy Chaser
Joined
Dec 18, 2007
Posts
1,160
I'm pretty sure you can't hold his stuff as hostage. I personally would just get him the hell out of there. Take it from someone who has had nothing but terrible roomates.

In college, I kept all my shit locked, always. I would never bring anything over 200 bucks to college, even my computer was a "spare parts" machine. CNU was a fucking nightmare in that regard, hell my roomate took my credit card and bought child pornography with it my freshman year. After he got kicked out (for that incident) I got a new roomate who I kept catching jerking off. Fucking disqusting.

After college, I lived with a guy who couldn't take care of himself (7-11 candy isle diet) and who's dog would eat the trash and shit and vomit everywhere, but it was his family's place so I'm stuck. Then I lived in an apartment with a guy who can't pay bills or rent (and I was the name on the lease), and I have to cover his part of the groceries. Hell, he wouldn't even go grocery shopping because "I'm not good at that".

Now I have my own place, and life is good. We rented the basement to some friends (a couple), and they just stole groceries and bitched. They were self serving and never helped out. Plus his ms. swan looking girlfriend just walked around in a bathrobe and panties (no top). They were obnoxious drunks and would try to play rock band on my ps3 and 52" TV at 3 in the morning when everyone else has to work the next day (because they were fucking drunk).

But seriously, don't waste your time or effort. No one wants to babysit anyone, especially a fucking adult (especially an obnoxious drunk). Get rid of him now, don't have some "intervention" and don't bother talking to him. Just get him out. You owe it at least to your other roomates.

EDIT: And always remember with these people, you give an inch they take a mile. You help him out once, he'll always expect it.
 
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lordnikon

Another Striker
Joined
Aug 7, 2003
Posts
324
I would have left this jerk at the airport. He blew his rent money on Vegas on the way there? What? Pfffff. That is the most irresponsible bullshit I have ever seen. There is a reason this guy was homeless. He is a deadbeat. Send him back to the streets.
 

OMFG

The Portuguese Chop
15 Year Member
Joined
Nov 20, 2007
Posts
4,704
Prior to my move to Connecticut, I've been in a similar situation.

An ex-roommate of mine was an alcoholic and at first used to go into my room and "borrow" the occasional dvd, videogame, or item (extra controller, batteries, etc). One day I noticed that my copy of "Oldboy" was missing. When I confronted him about the missing movie he stated that he never took it. From that point on I noticed that things in my room were being moved slightly. Not having a lock on the door, I put a simple toy-door counter that logs in times when the door to my room opens. Sure as shit, it logs in times immediately after I leave the house and times when I arrive.

Confronting him on this issue got him to stop, but I placed an emphasis on doing bodily harm to him if this shit continued. As for his drinking, I just kept on making fun of his lack of hair and his lethargic way of laying around the house. Now that I think about it I think he was slightly Bipolar.


Word to the wise:

1: Get locks on the door to your room.

2: Have a sit down with him and the other roommates and persuade him to "Change or get the fuck out".

3: Get ready to change the locks if he doesn't agree to change.

Personally, I agree with Norton and Kernow on this. Kick his ass and then kick his ass out. He will get worse if you don't take action.

BTW, before I moved I did find "Oldboy" in his room (over one year later).
 

Neo Geo MVS

Igniz's Servent
Joined
Apr 14, 2006
Posts
1,071
I have to agree with others just kick him out, you seem to be the nice guy who was trying to help him out but if he has a problem with alcohol this can only end badly. You might actually get more stuff stolen if he even stole the HD DVD and you owe it to your other roommates to not have problematic situations in your home. It's sad he is in this situation because if he doesn't man up in life he will end up a bum forever and only because he has a weak mentality. I know its hard to give up booze when your a alcoholic but it's not impossible to do and nowadays people have this habit of wasting more money than they take in leaving them in debt and never being able to dig themselves out of the hole they created.

I also have to add my 2 cents in from personal experience I have a friend who used to rent a house where friends and other friends of friends used to kick it at and he used to meet new people who end up being in the same type of situation where they had no where to stay at and he used to let them stay at his house. Only to have his house fucked up all messy and have random stuff disappear every so often and everyone was a fucking alcoholic even him so no one could see what was happening since they were so drunk off their ass everyday and I do mean every single day. Those type of people wont do what true roommates will do like clean up after themselves or for other roommates or share expenses or even contribute to buying food, so you should watch out because this guy doesn't seem like he will change nor contribute to the household but I hope for his sake he mans up and takes responsibility for his actions. Good luck

By the way my question is how the hell do you know this guy you picked up at the airport?
 
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SouthtownKid

There are four lights
20 Year Member
Joined
Oct 12, 2003
Posts
27,001
Doesn't matter if he took the DVDs or not; he has to go.

I don't know how you found that guy, but whatever it was, don't do it again.
 

caleb1883

Super Spy Agent
Joined
May 24, 2006
Posts
600
Doesn't matter if he took the DVDs or not; he has to go.

I don't know how you found that guy, but whatever it was, don't do it again.

Craigslist. Had to do it. Roomate moving out, and needed to fill the room. First time I lived with someone I didn't know personally before hand.
 

Hippee

Sgt. Pistachio,
Joined
Mar 10, 2002
Posts
728
Seems a good rule of thumb is to never help people out. At least maybe don't help them out because you feel sorry for them - maybe that's the wrong reason. I recently loaned a game system to a piece of shit and never got it back - I didn't know him THAT well - but I felt sorry for him.

Don't let assholes into your life.

Drinking brings out the worst in people (I've only met a couple people where this is not true - also, I don't drink).

Beat the fucking shit out of the guy. It'll make you feel better. Or mace him.
 

kernow

The Goob Hunter
20 Year Member
Joined
Sep 1, 2001
Posts
35,019
man

craig and his list has a lot to answer for



it'd be hard to just pick a random up at the airport and him tell you 'oh by the way I blew all my money in vegas' and not get the fuck out of there ASAP though.
 

Zenimus

Zantetsu's Blade Sharpener
Joined
Apr 11, 2005
Posts
2,446
Ugh... why do people choose to live with roommates? If you can't afford the rent on your own, move to a place where you can.

What's the point of having your own place if you're stuck with a community living room or kitchen? Speaking from personal experience, even if they're your good friends, constantly having roommates around is annoying.

Maybe I'm just a little more territorial than most others...?

---

Anyway, back to the subject, definitely get rid of that roommate when you can. He's already displayed way too many character flaws than I could tolerate in my home.
 

BigTinz

VT's Bitch , You can fuck this mouth for a fruit c
Joined
Jul 19, 2007
Posts
4,278
If you decide to let him stay, by a cheap webcam for surveillance. There is free 24/7 web cam software available.
 

HeartlessNinny

Heartlessness is a virtue
Joined
Sep 16, 2005
Posts
14,664
Legally I'm not sure what I can do here. He has not signed paperwork with me. My name is on the lease, and the landlord allows me to sub-lease at will. I'm assuming since I have no paperwork and no money from him I could change the locks and hold his stuff hostage until I get a check. I know from my business law class you have to have consideration, or both parties have to give something up to have a contract, written or unwritten, and he hasn't given anything to me.

Here's what I'd do if I were you.

Change the locks when he's out (and I mean the very next time he leaves the place). When he comes back and figures out what's going on, just say, "Sorry. I'm not comfortable living with you. Find somewhere else to live." Then give him his shit back, but don't let him inside. If he gets unreasonable, tell him to come back for his stuff when he calms down. If he asks for an explaination, tell him you don't owe him one. Your name is on the lease.

You'll be out the month's rent and whatever he stole, but this way, you can (hopefully) get rid of him with a minimum amount of effort. Fighting with him over his stuff or whatever probably isn't worth the battle.

Don't feel guilty. Don't feel remorse. Just kick his ass to the curb and use your energy to find a more reputatble roommate.

And next time, get some references, get the month's rent in advance, and ask for a damage deposit while you're at it. You have to protect yourself when you live with strangers, or you'll get fucked (as you're already discovering unfortunately).
 
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