Loud Housemates

[Mac91]

[REAL TALK]I have heard my housemate having sex several times, having only lived there for two months. There's something about hearing him slapping away and his gf moaning (like you'd hear in a shit porno) that just gets on my nerves.

So great, a housemate has sex. No big deal, we all get a little overexcited. Last night, they were at it in the shower which is right next to my room. I poked my head out my bedroom door and the bathroom door was fully open! Who the fuck does that? After asking/telling them to "shut the fuck up", what would you guys do?[/REAL TALK]

 

[Craig]

Sit down on the toilet and take a shit...

Maybe they are inviting you to get involved...

 

[Rot]

L I V E W E B C A M F E E D . . .

T H A T ' L L . . . S C H O O L ' E M . . .

x R O T x

 

[Mac91]

There is only a shower and a sink.

 

[Bill Kilgore]

I would keep yelling "stop it" while they are doing it. Result: their sex is ruined and then next time they might think about doing it more quiet. That is if they don't like to be interupted. Otherwise it's a strong invitation and you could join in with sticking your weenie in her mouth. Result: you get atleast 50% less sound and you get a nice bj. Either way it's a win-win situation.

 

[Neo Ash]

There is only a shower and a sink.

What's stopping you?

 

[wyo]

Furious masturbation sessions.

 

[GohanX]

I know this is a crazy idea but you could, you know, sit down with your housemate and discuss your concerns like an adult.

 

[Mac91]

I know this is a crazy idea but you could, you know, sit down with your housemate and discuss your concerns like an adult.

I thought shouting "shut the fuck up" was an adult way to approach the situation?

 

[FilthyRear]

Furious masturbation sessions.

And make sure you go well past the point of climax. Show your dick who's boss.

I know this is a crazy idea but you could, you know, sit down with your housemate and discuss your concerns like an adult.

Failing that, you could also have loud sex yourself. Two can play that game.

If you're gay, I'm sure the loud gay secks would make them think twice about leaving the bathroom door open.

 

[DNSDies]

Well, first, you go to a pet store and buy ALL THE GRASSHOPPERS....

 

[Ip Man]

this can be a bit of a shit situation.there's tons of people out there who are just too lazy to show respect for the people around them selves.if you have already told them to keep it down and if it was to no avail,then you have to ask your self how much it really bothers you.do they do it three in the morning and wake you up from your sleep?.if that's the case then you might need to consider new flatmates.

 

[StevenK]

Rape him. That should break them up.

 

[Jibbajaba]

This wouldn't bother you nearly as much if you were getting laid. Every moan from his girlfriend is a reminder of your failure as a man.

 

[NeoSneth]

Bring it up, but dont be a dick about it. Joke about it at breakfast or something. " Hey, it's hard to sleep when it sounds like you are filming a snuff film through the walls"

or, get yourself a screamer, and then have a friendly competition.

 

[HDRchampion]

Use your tears for lube...

 

[ki_atsushi]

This wouldn't bother you nearly as much if you were getting laid. Every moan from his girlfriend is a reminder of your failure as a man.

/thread

 

[neo_mao]

Maybe they are inviting you to get involved...

I agree - this was clearly an invitation to join to fun. However, having seen the OPs penis I can say with confidence that he made the correct decision not to accept this invitation...

 

[HDRchampion]

I agree - this was clearly an invitation to join to fun. However, having seen the OPs penis I can say with confidence that he made the correct decision not to accept this invitation...

Tag teamming a girl has always been 2nd degree gay to me. DP with balls possibly contacting & of course your eyes closed the whole time. no thanks.

 

[Mac91]

This wouldn't bother you nearly as much if you were getting laid. Every moan from his girlfriend is a reminder of your failure as a man.

I regularly pull open the beef curtains, don't get me wrong. It's just that the door was open, and they weren't even trying to be quiet. If I could kind of make out the moaning after turning netflix off and straining my ears, then okay; but no.

 

[celeritas]

I know this is a crazy idea but you could, you know, sit down with your housemate and discuss your concerns like an adult.

Hahaha, I lol'ed. That idea is crazy! You too crazy, man!

 

[Beelzebub]

Next time they're fucking in the shower throw a bucket of ice water on them. Me and a couple roomies did that to one of our roommates back in the day. He was so fucking pissed.

 

[andsuchisdeath]

[REAL ANSWER] Where do you place in the household hierarchy? Who is only two months into the living situation, you or him?

If the latter, you need to establish clear and reasonable expectations. If he can't abide, and you can't kick him out, then you fucked up in the roommate screening process. It's not that hard to detect the type who's ready to muscle others when they should be paying their dues instead.

If it's the former, express your needs, don't look like a punk, but demonstrate an understanding in how "things are done" in the house. If he's been banging chicks in that bathroom for years, he most likely isn't going to change his ways for the new guy soon without the right type of prompting.

 

[joecommando]

Tag teamming a girl has always been 2nd degree gay to me. DP with balls possibly contacting & of course your eyes closed the whole time. no thanks.

the golden rule https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi7gwX7rjOw

 

[WoodyXP]

what would you guys do?

Nut on their pillows.