Any tips for dealing with an older family member who is an alcoholic?

[Massive Urethra Chode]

offer him pity sex

 

[F4U57]

It's very important to separate this from genetics. I've sat in on some AA meetings, and so many of them blamed genetics because their family had alcoholics. There is not a gene that makes you more more prone to alcoholism or child abuse. This exists as a pattern primarily due to learned behavior. You could argue there are genes that make you more likely to fall into patterns of behavior, but there is nothing that drives alcoholism.

There are numerous studies linking alcholism to genetics, generally 50% genetics against the other 50% of hereditary, learned behaviour and other risk factors. I’m not talking about an “alcoholic gene” so don’t get me wrong there, but genetics that amplify the chances of addiction, how the brain processes and weighs up the good and bad qualities related to any substance abuse. I don’t see your point why it’s “very important to separate” out the arguement, I also don’t know why you’re bringing up child abuse.

 

[NeoSneth]

There are numerous studies linking alcholism to genetics, generally 50% genetics against the other 50% of hereditary, learned behaviour and other risk factors. I’m not talking about an “alcoholic gene” so don’t get me wrong there, but genetics that amplify the chances of addiction, how the brain processes and weighs up the good and bad qualities related to any substance abuse. I don’t see your point why it’s “very important to separate” out the arguement, I also don’t know why you’re bringing up child abuse.

They are frequently discussed together, so part of it is reflex. Most studies will track them both. The genetic link is pretty weak as a direct contributor, but I already noted people susceptible to patterns of behavior often cite this as a cause to alcoholism
It's important to separate it because it's a lazy ignorant crutch of an excuse. If you allow them to believe this, then they use it as an excuse to carry on with the behavior time and time again. "It's in my genes, its not my fault." It also trivializes people with actual genetic challenges.

This is my field, so I do get tired of people discussing genetics for behavior in general.

 

[F4U57]

That’s fair, I can accept that. I get that it may allow them to use it as an excuse, but that’s on that individual to find an excuse or not take ownership. It’s different for everybody how they choose / don’t choose to manage it.

 

[Force]

They are frequently discussed together, so part of it is reflex. Most studies will track them both. The genetic link is pretty weak as a direct contributor, but I already noted people susceptible to patterns of behavior often cite this as a cause to alcoholism
It's important to separate it because it's a lazy ignorant crutch of an excuse. If you allow them to believe this, then they use it as an excuse to carry on with the behavior time and time again. "It's in my genes, its not my fault." It also trivializes people with actual genetic challenges.

This is my field, so I do get tired of people discussing genetics for behavior in general.

So what's your thoughts on genetics impacting sexual orientation?

 

[famicommander]

Learn Karate and then do Karate on his face every time he tries to drink.

 

[StevenK]

Learn Karate and then do Karate on his face every time he tries to drink.

What if he's drinking hai karate? Then you're in trouble.

 

[NeoSneth]

So what's your thoughts on genetics impacting sexual orientation?

like many things, this is nature + nurture. not one or the other. both.
People are born a certain way. Sexuality can also be influenced by culture. That's not to say you could program someone, but you can certainly influence what is acceptable and "normal".

 

[Marek]

It's very important to separate this from genetics. I've sat in on some AA meetings, and so many of them blamed genetics because their family had alcoholics. There is not a gene that makes you more more prone to alcoholism or child abuse. This exists as a pattern primarily due to learned behavior. You could argue there are genes that make you more likely to fall into patterns of behavior, but there is nothing that drives alcoholism.

My genetics are English/Irish and then polish/Russian

Im just saying... If I get on one drinking too much I can easily get to a 750ml of tequilla downed in a 24 hr period.

I understand what you're saying, but theres no gene for alcohol tolerance or a superhuman liver? When i partied with my half native friend from Nome alaska it was nuts. We were having a blast getting drinks and cracking up then BOOM he turned a corner and was incoherent shambling drunk like the blink of an eye. People always say that theres a lack of an alcohol processing gene in some peoples.

 

[Marek]

like many things, this is nature + nurture. not one or the other. both.
People are born a certain way. Sexuality can also be influenced by culture. That's not to say you could program someone, but you can certainly influence what is acceptable and "normal".

I also completely agree with this. Its a mix of both for sure.

Tons of people are born that wat. But when people say every single homosexual is born that way they are discounting the mental toll and resulting psychological responses to being beaten the fuck out of and called a faggot as a child, or being molested by a man etc.

 

[evil wasabi]

like many things, this is nature + nurture. not one or the other. both.
People are born a certain way. Sexuality can also be influenced by culture. That's not to say you could program someone, but you can certainly influence what is acceptable and "normal".

I agree.

We are seeing this big time in latin america. There's a movement in Argentina to neutralize the language and spread the use of "latinx", and replacing a/o with e. "muchache", "guape", "goatse." Not a fan personally. The motivation is to "abolish the patriarchy" which seems way too butt hurt for my tastes.

 

[Marek]

I agree.

We are seeing this big time in latin america. There's a movement in Argentina to neutralize the language and spread the use of "latinx", and replacing a/o with e. "muchache", "guape", "goatse." Not a fan personally. The motivation is to "abolish the patriarchy" which seems way too butt hurt for my tastes.

I guess they should just start speaking Latin and change all nouns to the neuter gender.

 

[NeoSneth]

My genetics are English/Irish and then polish/Russian

Im just saying... If I get on one drinking too much I can easily get to a 750ml of tequilla downed in a 24 hr period.

I understand what you're saying, but theres no gene for alcohol tolerance or a superhuman liver? When i partied with my half native friend from Nome alaska it was nuts. We were having a blast getting drinks and cracking up then BOOM he turned a corner and was incoherent shambling drunk like the blink of an eye. People always say that theres a lack of an alcohol processing gene in some peoples.

Asian Flush is real, but there is no Irish resiliency drinking gene. Asian flush is caused by processing the alcohol into a toxic byproduct too quickly. It's opposite of what some people think. The gene is found all over the world but quite rare in European decent. People can handle different amounts of alcohol, but that is mostly tolerance and age.

I'm Irish so i must drink. I'm italian so I must pasta. I'm russian so I must vodka. These are some of my biggest pet peeves when people take genetic lineage tests.

 

[Marek]

Asian Flush is real, but there is no Irish resiliency drinking gene. Asian flush is caused by processing the alcohol into a toxic byproduct too quickly. It's opposite of what some people think. The gene is found all over the world but quite rare in European decent. People can handle different amounts of alcohol, but that is mostly tolerance and age.

I'm Irish so i must drink. I'm italian so I must pasta. I'm russian so I must vodka. These are some of my biggest pet peeves when people take genetic lineage tests.

Didnt know that about the Asian flush, but in reading this stuff https://www.researchgate.net/post/I...re_genetically_more_susceptible_to_alcoholism it seems like there might be something to suggest that natives have a harder time breaking down alcohol over time.

/shrugs

 

[Azra113]

The cure to substance abuse isn't in rehab but in therapy. He can't stand being sober; so you need to figure out what his issue is and see if you can actually help him. But keep in mind that when you force someone to quit, they just change their coping mechanism. Have faith though, I know crackheads and heroin addicts that beat their substance abuse. The first step for this is him accepting that he has a problem that he needs to over come.

 

[NeoSneth]

Didnt know that about the Asian flush, but in reading this stuff https://www.researchgate.net/post/I...re_genetically_more_susceptible_to_alcoholism it seems like there might be something to suggest that natives have a harder time breaking down alcohol over time.

/shrugs

It would not surprise me if Native Americans also suffer from Alcohol induced flush. I couldn't comment specifically as there is very little data for Native Americans in general. Lineage markers are one thing, but overall population genetics is a vastly different dataset. It is/was a common issue for some midwest forensic experts.

 

[skateonwalls]

This is often the largest point right here. For a vast majority of these people, they're mentally ill. Now...getting them to see or admit that and then get help for it? Yeah...not so easy.

I grew up thinking that my mother was an alcoholic. She was highly abusive to me, both mentally and physically and liquor made it so much worse. She quit drinking over 10 years ago but it still just at awful, I had to cut her from my life in 2015.

I always say some people get violent or nasty when drunk. Others that just how they are and the drug makes it worse.

 

[MetalSlugVet]

The cure to substance abuse isn't in rehab but in therapy. He can't stand being sober; so you need to figure out what his issue is and see if you can actually help him. But keep in mind that when you force someone to quit, they just change their coping mechanism. Have faith though, I know crackheads and heroin addicts that beat their substance abuse. The first step for this is him accepting that he has a problem that he needs to over come.

Unfortunately his life is very hard and he is unhappy. He married a women from China about 15 years ago and the culture clash is downright hard to watch still to this day. He had a great life up until he got married and now he works and does all the house work and chores.

Also I do think genetics plays a role with addicts. I’ve known many addicts with parents or grandparents with the same issue. I don’t know the science behind it but it most certainly goes hand and hand with some people.

 

[LoneSage]

Oh fuck...

 

[Heinz]

Didnt know that about the Asian flush, but in reading this stuff https://www.researchgate.net/post/I...re_genetically_more_susceptible_to_alcoholism it seems like there might be something to suggest that natives have a harder time breaking down alcohol over time.

/shrugs

It all comes down to how active your alcohol dehydrogenase enzymes are in your liver and that part is genetic. However tolerance is due to a higher number of those enzymes from long term alcohol consumption.

My other half doesn't get hangovers... She can drink me under the table and wake up with a spring in her step that crushes my soul as I lay dying like a dessicated mushroom.

 

[lithy]

Oh fuck...

 

[StevenK]

It all comes down to how active your alcohol dehydrogenase enzymes are in your liver and that part is genetic. However tolerance is due to a higher number of those enzymes from long term alcohol consumption.

My other half doesn't get hangovers... She can drink me under the table and wake up with a spring in her step that crushes my soul as I lay dying like a dessicated mushroom.

I can't even talk to people who don't get hangovers.

 

[NeoSneth]

I can't even talk to people who don't get hangovers.

Physical fitness plays a role in this as well. My counterpart will drink a bottle of wine, pass out, and go running in the morning. I'll still be in bed for hours and hours. Fatty tissue is no good for alcohol drinking.

 

[F4U57]

I can't even talk to people who don't get hangovers.

Agreed. Fuck those cunts.

I’m into hangover prevention these days - milk thistle, Hydralyte, Aspro - but sometimes I just forget, then the next day is rough. I will admit, I’ve been drinking heaps during Iso, it’s too easy.

 

[MetalSlugVet]

Oh fuck...

Nothing against the Chinese, it’s just my aunt is just kind of a high maintenance princess type of women which America is filled with as well. She is much younger then my uncle and very pretty but her housewife skills are lacking!